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Now available on Amazon and Kindle
with
C. Bradford Chappell, PhD
Inspiration for this book is drawn from my multi-year journey from deep depression and near-suicide to wholeness and joy through discovering the gifts in the wounds.
Start your own journey of understanding five keys to unlock your most valuable personal gifts.
- Mark L. Dayton
Turn Your Most Fearsome Enemy
Into Your Strongest Ally
Unlock Your Life’s Greatest gifts
We all have amazing life-gifts right in front of us that we never open. They have the power to move our lives to new heights of success and satisfaction; but we keep them locked up, untouched, and unopened.
The keys to the locks are also right in front of us. Ironically, we believe them to be an enemy to avoid at all costs. So locks remain shut, and gifts unclaimed.
This book will guide you in discovering five keys that open the locks to these remarkable life-gifts.
The process isn’t painless, and is highly counter-intuitive – which is why so few people discover it. But for those willing to fully engage, it becomes effortless, freeing and deeply rewarding.
Chapter 5: Victory over Victim
Book Excerpt: Key #2
2. Victory over Victim
Victimization is life. Victim is a choice.
“When we experience pain, we have a choice. We can go into fear and follow our natural inclination and resist or avoid the pain – putting us on the path to the dead end of Victim.”
“This is the ‘stuck-in-the-story cycle. It goes like this: Ouch! – Grrrr – Bla-bla-bla
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Ouch! is the pain we are resisting that starts the cycle. It could be remembering a wounding experience, regretting a past action, reliving a victimizing trauma, or a thousand other wounds.
‘Grrrr’ is our resistance to the pain: setting our jaw, baring our claws, pushing back, and resisting. This soon leads to the ‘Grrrr’ of anger, frustration, envy, revenge, and depression.”
‘Bla-bla-bla. “Because we are hurt and angry and depressed, we feel we have to justify our position, so we cook up a story to salve our wounds. This concocted tale is full of justification, blame, and accusations that we endlessly bla-bla-bla to anyone who will listen.”
“So, it’s the Ouch! Grrrr… Bla-bla-bla cycle,” I said, writing the words around the three dead end circles, “that keep us stuck in Victim.”